top of page

Redefining Life With Chronic Illness

Updated: May 16, 2022

Ever since I was young, I thought of myself as independent.

I moved out when I was 18, and I was quite proud of myself for not relying on my family for financial support. I loved the feeling of independence, and it has always been one of my top values.

Then I got sick, and it felt like my independence was taken from me. It started small. At first, my husband would clean and cook more often than I did. Then, he cleaned and cooked all of our meals.

When I was too weak, he was picking me up from hospital appointments. Then, I would wake him up when I was vomiting in the middle of the night. He would come, clean up, and so on.

My doctor appointments and flare-ups would cause me to miss work. In every aspect of my life, I felt like a huge liability, and I felt worthless. I couldn't seem to get anything right. I felt the complete opposite of independence.

All of a sudden, I felt like I had to rely on everyone. And as much as I cherished my financial independence, I could see that I would not be able to work much longer with the way things were going.

So...what was left? Who was I when all those things were taken away?

I focused on my skills and the things I could do. I've always been great at organizing. So, even though I wasn't physically moving too much, when I had more energy, I paid all of our bills, prepared our budgets, ordered groceries online, handled all the admin tasks, and so on.

I looked at our processes and came up with ways that I could participate from the couch. I planned great trips and activities for us. Well, not quite active activities, but activities nonetheless.

My role had changed, and I had to learn to rely on others and ask for help, but that didn't mean I was any less worthy of love than before. I still had the same talents and traits. I just had to utilize them differently now.

How are you still using your talents and traits now? Let me know in the comments below.


bottom of page